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My Blog

I Didn't Sign Up For This

Good morning to everyone.  Happy weekend.  It is a beautiful day here in the Chicago land area.  Warm and sunny.  I have so much to do today...not really sure where to even begin.  Isn't that a sad statement.  I have finished transplanting some tomatoes this morning.  I cannot believe how many seeds I had planted...my hand seems to have been a bit heavy when pouring in the seeds. I counted 80 tomatoes plants.  They are all heirloom and organic...not sure where I am going to put them all.  But it was a stellar crop!  I was able to transplant about 45 of them...I need to buy some more organic dirt to finish. 
Well, today's blog is about the statement..."I didn't sign up for this".  I remember wanting to be a parent my whole life.  I thought that having children would be the most idyllic thing in the world.  One big happy family...a typical day like in the show "Father Knows Best"  I guess when I watched that show years ago, I thought that having the regular family would be wonderful....hmm...when I watch or hear the program (on radio talk show)...it seems that I missed the hard parts.  I seemed to overlook that Bud (the son) was always questioning things and throwing little quirks in the way.  As for the older daughter Bettie...I suppose I also missed the drama that went on when it came to boys and dating.  And of course Cathie, aka Kitten, was always feeling left out and complaining.  It just always seemed that they were this happy family at the end of the day.  Wow...that is what I signed up for! 
Turns out...that isn't quite the way life works.  Well, maybe it is.  I remember the years of parenting and even grandparenting.  Things were just like they were on that show.  Girls were lamenting over boys, mood swings, fights with friends, troubles at school.  One feeling like the parents cared more for the other sibling.  Kids always wanting what the other kids have.  I remember a time when my daughters were not happy when we didn't have cable tv when it first came out...in fact it wasn't for at least 10 years before we got it.  I remember being upset and not wanting the girls to have pagers when they came out...not to mention a phone.  I still have trouble with the idea of being "on call" 24 hours a day.  Then there was the argument over Tattoos....not what I signed up for...thank you very much.  Now, I declare that everyone has the right to do as they please with their bodies...but my daughters were not going to get a tattoo as a young girl.  Yesterday, we saw a graduation at a restaurant and the young graduate was covered in them.  This is a permanent thing being done to your body....are they ready to make such a judgment at such a young age.  I suppose I am an old fuddie duddie. 
I didn't sign up for a lot of things.  Financial decisions, scrimping and saving, caring for parents, grandkids and so much more.  I may not have signed up for it...but that never stopped any of it from coming.  Now...here is the real kicker....I CHOSE to do it!  All of it.  Even when I didn't sign up for it, because it was what I thought was the right things to do! 
Kids get mad, slam doors, scream and yell "I Hate You" sometimes in the process...but I just kept going.  Parents got old, forgetful, sometimes angry! But caring and loving them even though it was hard to do...in my heart was the right thing to do...even though I didn't sign up for it!  Marriage...well, I could write a book instead of just a blog...this wasn't exactly what I signed up for...but I didn't give up and quit.  I didn't sign up for old age and fibromyalgia, psoriatic arthritis.  aches and pains in the morning and throughout the day and night...I didn't sign up for sleepless nights due to worrying or just cant sleep syndrome.  I signed up for a life of happy go lucky days and evenings in front of a fire.  
I bet if I look around, most of us didn't sign up for what we got in life.  I am sure most of us that are aging didn't realize how hard this was going to be. 
but, the amazing thing is...I didn't sign up for some of the wonderful things either.  the things in life that I never expected.  I received a chance to be with parents and learn so much more about them during those time that I didn't sign up for.  I raised a grandchild and learned what parenting was like when I had more time and patience.  I learned all about bonding in the true sense of the word....when I didn't sign up for that1  I gained knowledge, respect and understanding of things I would never have dreamed I could ever understand from the things I didn't sign up for. 
So, in the end, I have to still iterate that most of what happened in my life....I didn't sign up for...but I am grateful God loved me enough that He signed me up.  So when you are at wits end and wondering WHY ME?  It was a blessing. 

1 Comment to I Didn't Sign Up For This:

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vistshop on Thursday, June 05, 2014 3:51 PM
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